There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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