I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I look better un-naked...
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
