THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
