I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
