I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I would ride that face into the sunset
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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