he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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