I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
you will always have a special place in my vag
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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