dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
