It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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