I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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