5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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