If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize