I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize