And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I have demons in me.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
