glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
