My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize