Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
