The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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