just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
