She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize