Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
