I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
