I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Say something about gay babies.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
