Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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