this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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