Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
