I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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