As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
