We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
