My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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