Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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