I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
