shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
