this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
