I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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