I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
