I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize