we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Randomize
