I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
