I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
