end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I just cut my nipple shaving
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
