I'm so fucking centered right now
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
