Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She bit a glass in half.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
