ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
