Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
