She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
The uberlube is also flammable
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
