god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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