Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize