thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
