I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
