im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
